Thought Full

Who I am

 

I'm your host. Like the guy that greets you at the restaurant, but the show's really inside.

 

Why I do this

 

I’m 12 years old. Just got my hands on a copy of Daydream Believer with lawn mowing money. I love the Monkees and Davy Jones. My dad has a reel to reel tape deck in the off limits closet. In it is an old heavy mic. Stuff I wasn’t supposed to touch. I grab the mic and there’s the 45 spinning around on my little record player, the kind that has a flip top. I set the needle down. From the tinny speakers…

Oh, I could hide ‘neath the wings
Of the bluebird as she sings.

I listen to the words about hiding beneath the wings. It’s a chance to improvise my life because the words feel safe to me after another bullied day at school. Davey is getting close to the chorus, my eyes close, lip synching my best Jones and my bedroom melts away.

 

Cheer up, Sleepy Jean, (but I hear Jim)
Oh, what can it mean.
To a daydream believer

 

I hear the crowd roar as I croon to thousands.  My childhood sweetheart Barbara, is out there, passing out like I was a Beatle on the Ed Sullivan show. I’m swinging my body back and forth, just like Davey, immersed in the adulations of my screaming fans. Flowers fly onto the stage along with a bra or two. The only thing I know about bras at 12 is that 1) girls burned them for some reason and 2) they were bouquets for rock and roll stars. I accept them gratefully.

 

Then high over the crowd I hear… “Jimmy, turn the music down”! 

 

My eyes open to my empty bedroom. No one here. It was so real I double check to make sure there isn’t bra on the floor in case mom came in. I repeat my performance for hours on end playing to a full house in my head. I was Davy Jones, Tom Jones, Glenn Campbell, and Paul McCartney but Davy, he lit the spark.

 

And our good times start and end
without dollar one to spend.
But how much, baby, do we really need.

 

I remember a viewer telling the station, “I saw this music show on your channel and then started playing my keyboard for the first time in three years.” That’s why we are here. Inspiration, where arts and culture starts. That’s why we call it Mee Mee TV. 

 

In this moment, pinching myself, I open my eyes and heart. I see you out there. For real. You are full of dreams and making them come true and helping others do the same. Everybody has their Davy Jones.

 

“Now you know how happy I can be.”

 

Jai Jacksonville

Jim 

 

more here at jimalabiso.com